Wednesday, December 30, 2009


Each day, Jack and I have a conversation that goes something like this -

Me - "I am going to take a shower now."
J - "And after you take a shower?"
Me - "I am going to get ready."
J - "And after you get ready?"
Me - "I am going to do laundry."
J - "And after you do laundry?"
Me - "You will get dressed."
J - "And after I get dressed?"
Me - "I don't know!"
J - "And after I don't know?"
Me - "Jack, I don't know what we're doing today."
J - "And after I don't know?"
Me - "I DON'T KNOW!"

This can go on for hours. Jack will keep asking me "and after....?" until he gets a satisfactory answer. I often have to make things up, just so I can give him an answer that will appease him for the time being. Such a fun game!

When we can, Lonnie and I try very hard to make specific plans about where we are going to go, what order they are going to go in, and who is going to be present while we're going to these places. Why? Because Jack needs it that way. If we don't make a very specific plan about our activities for the day, Jack feels completely lost and out of control. He needs to know exactly what is going on. He is constantly wondering what activity is going to come next. In a world where not every waking minute can be planned or scheduled, this makes life a little challenging!

This week has been especially hard since school is out for winter break. School is a huge part of Jack's schedule and is kind of what we base our routine around. He knows that when he has school, every day pretty much looks the same. Without school, the days have less structure and more "free" time. This is so hard. While I try to be as scheduled as I can, there are days when there just isn't a schedule to go by! I have things to do around the house, we don't have any errands to run, it's snowing outside....the "nothingness" creates chaos!

So, here I go - back to answer the questions of "and after....?" We have plans for this afternoon. I can give him a concrete answer for a few hours. And soon enough, it will be time to start planning for tomorrow.

1 comment:

Monica said...

Give him a schedule at home too just like he has at school. This will keep him from getting so frustrated and from you wanting to feel like you are losing your mind. Something like: eat breakfast, watch tv, get dressed, puzzles, playdough, coloring, computer, lunch, etc.....set the timer too so he knows when one task is over and another begins.